To Whom it May Concern

So I go onto Facebook tonight (this morning... what have you) at 2am thinking sarcastically "I guess I want to feel bad about myself, huh?" but mostly just wanting to see if there is something new to read in my bored, insomniatic state of mind.

First thing that pops up: an old crush is now engaged. Second thing I notice: a good* friend from out of state is here in my state, and in a city about an hour away from me... and failed to text or call as I do when I pass through their hometown for a visit. Third thing: everyone talking about the new Pokemon app that I have yet to discover, and lots of people generally connecting.
(*because apparently I have misjudged the depth of our relationship)

Now these may not seem like very relevant things to a lot of people. And I suppose those people are rational people who know that someone else's engagement should be a general cause for a 'like' and a scroll on. And that someone coming into town and forgetting to call is just an oversight and means nothing other than human forgetfulness. And well, new apps and cultural things that bond people is something I chose not to participate in as of yet (I already dedicate my free time to youtube, plants vs zombies, and pinterest enough as it is... now they try to tempt me with a childhood nostalgia??).

However, studies have proven that social media actually isn't as good for us as we think. While we may connect with those in far away places (like Gallifrey or whatever other alien planet suits you) we tend to be creatures of comparison.

I honestly can't remember where I heard this phrase, but I liked it and would give credit where credit is due could I remember, but it went something like this: "We are comparing our own bloopers to others' highlight reels." And it's true! With the internet and the way the world is connected, we compare our own full and mostly complete knowledge of our personal lives and struggles, with the seemingly glamorous photos of people's awesome summer getaways and high-end jobs, graduations, baby births, engagement announcements, and much more.

So while I sat here looking at someone's Mexican study abroad feeling utterly jealous while commenting innocently* on that picture of the 'friend' who is standing somewhere you could have been as well: "oh, are you here in town?? cool!" while simultaneously feeling forever alone after scrolling through countless (and I mean COUNTLESS) relationship status changes and couple pics..... I decided to write. Because it was the only thing I could think of to do.
*(it wasn't innocent... I was trying to manipulate a specific response..)

Now maybe I felt like I could inspire other people, or maybe just relate. Because yeah, sometimes people's lives look awesome, but you know what? They have problems too. And yes. I know that sounds cliche. But stay with me here. Why do YOU (and by you I mean me here) post the things you do on instagram or facebook or snapchat? I literally have posted some selfies and other pictures in the last month solely for the "cool" factor. I just wanted to seem cool. And quite possibly "cooler than I am".
*(I'm pretty dang hard to beat....)

Now I have just admitted to falling into at least 2 of these problems: 1. Comparing myself to my internet friends; 2. Posting things only to seem cool to other people.

So next time you feel like Han Solo in a smelly alien trash compactor with an annoying whiny future sith lord and a princess who hasn't made up her mind whether she likes the mysterious sexy space outlaw over her own brother*....... Just remember that you do it, too. You wouldn't post a picture of yourself with the food poisoning at Vidcon that forced you to stay in a fancy hotel room rather than parooze the sights and famous people awaiting you, so don't expect others to post all of their dark secrets or hard times, either. They're going to post the "cool" stuff, just as much as you are... whatever that stuff may be for you. Don't compare yourself no matter how hard that is!!! Read this again if you need to after a bout scrolling through your social media.*(she didn't know it was her brother yet, but just stay with me here... but seriously, this whole thing was just uncomfortable for all of us) 

 DON'T COMPARE YOUR FLAWS TO OTHERS' SEEMING PERFECTION! :)

And my last take-away, if there is any, is this: if you're like me and you have relatively no life, sometimes what is cool or something of a personal accomplishment can be as simple as finishing a good book and bragging about it to all your friends. Or posting a picture with a pun. Or walking outside. Or.... well, idk. You get the idea, right?

Your accomplishments are still accomplishments.
And your cool is your own brand of cool!

So maybe you don't take the fancy or fun trips to Europe or Comicon. Maybe you have been taking as long as a medical doctor specializing in oncology to get your degree in underwater basket weaving (guilty, I am (disclaimer: I'm NOT this big of a star wars nerd, it just seemed applicable today!)). And maybe your accomplishment for the day is simply surviving whatever tasks are before you. And for that, you should be applauded, my friend. You are here now, reading this. Good for you. ... Or maybe I should apologize.

Either way, I hope you know that you are your own person. You are unique and special and there is nobody else that could be more you than you. Unless they hired a really pretty, witty, nerdy, yet adventurous actress to play me in a movie some day.... then maybe she could be more "me" than me..... okay that brings us back to my point. Just be you. And one day, you will find that you stop comparing yourself to others, and applaud with them in their journey through life.

Hope this helped.. I know it was at least entertaining for ME!
Your* friend,
Laura.
*I honestly don't know who reads this, so whoever it is, I guess we can be friends now. I hope my disclaimer notes don't bother you! I have an opening for a new friend if you haven't noticed by this post, so you can apply in the comments on here if you'd like..... #kiddingnotkidding